BATgirl – Wave your flag!

I started the BATmom blog almost a year ago and this year has been filled with learning, traveling and celebrating.  Our celebrations culminated in very special family Shabbat, a Jerusalem Scavenger Hunt with BATgirl’s friends, and a very small and intimate celebration with our family and friends who know and have a connection with BATgirl.

At this evening BATdad and I presented to BATgirl the Bat Mitzvah Box (beautifully decorated by the BATsisters).  The Bat Mitzvah Box contains 12 gifts for her 12 years. With no further ado – here are the contents of the BATbox (in Bat Mitzvah Parent speech format)!

BATmitzvah box

BATbox with stencil, food erasors, bubbles and paints

  1. The Rubics cube –   BATgirl, we put this Rubics Cube in the Bat Mitzvah box, because you love learning new things, exploring new ideas and finding out how things work. Your teachers always tell us that you have the best general knowledge, and you are way ahead of your friends in your knowledge of Torah, Israel and even science subjects. We hope that you continue to be curious, to ask questions and to learn throughout your life, and we hope that we can always be there to answer your questions and forward you as you strive for knowledge, understanding and solutions!
  2. Place markers.  We bought this for you because you have been nagging us for them! You want them for your new siddur.  You’re absolutely right – you should have place markers to mark important tefilot, and also you should make yourself place markers to remember important days, important people, and important events.  In other words – know what and who is important in your life and look after it/them – nurture it/them. Examples of important things can be chagim or birthdays, your family, friends or teachers, your hobbies and talents even your memories.  Recognize the important things in your life and make sure that you make space for them.
  3. Food erasers – of course you are not a fussy eater – that is if you have rice, pasta or cous cous!  When it comes to the rest of the menu, it is a bit harder to convince you to eat. For that reason we put some food rubbers in the Bat Mitzvah box – we want to encourage you to be adventurous – try something new.  This can be with food, and this can be with experiences.  We have seen this year how you have become much more open to trying new things and we are very proud of your efforts – keep it up!
  4. Paints – I remember one time I came with you to a lesson with your art teacher.  You were painting something, and you really wanted pink. But not any pink, a very specific pink.  You mixed red and white to get the color, and at first you put too much white, and then you put too much red. You kept on adding and mixing and mixing and adding until you finally found the exact pink you wanted.  I was so proud of how you knew what you wanted and you didn’t compromise until you got it!  That is a very good quality and I know it will take you far in life – in fact I can’t wait to see where it will take you in life, I am already kvelling with pride at your future achievements!  BATgirl, we put some paints in the Bat Mitzvah box, and we hope that you continue to mix colors with confidence and creativity, and that you continue to strive to achieve all of your visions.

    Israel flower and bracelet

    Israel flower - May she grow and blossom Bracelet - with varying beads

  5. Israel flower -  In the Bat Mitzvah box you will see an Israel flower –  a flower with an Israeli flag.  You, BATgirl, are our Israel flower – our Sabra!  We hope that you continue to grow and blossom here in Israel!
  6. Bracelet – The reason why I chose this bracelet is because the beads are all different patterns, shapes and sizes.  You know, the difference between all the beads is what makes the bracelet beautiful – and this is the same with our family.  Each of us  – Abba, Ima, You, BATsister1, BATsister2 and even BATboy is a different person with different strengths and weaknesses, different likes and dislikes, different personalities – it is when we bring all of our differences together that we can be a team-  working together at our best.  I hope that this bracelet in your Bat Mitzvah box will remind you of how important it is that each one of us is different, and how we are most beautiful when we bring all our personal qualities together.

    Tree card

    From a large family tree

  7. Tree card – Since you started your Bat Mitzvah roots project we have talked a lot about our family tree. Last Friday we joked that in fact your name isn’t just BATgirl Tarlow – it is BATgirl Rothenstern Kahanowitz Leon Kaplinski Shinbaum Rurka Yankelowitz Tarlow.  We spoke about your grandparents and great grandparents and the contribution that they made to their communities.  Don’t worry –we didn’t insist that all those names would be printed on your new Machzor, however we put this tree in the Bat Mitzvah box, because we would like you to remember that you are part of a much greater family tree. The family tree doesn’t stop at your great grandfathers who were community leaders, partisans, doctors, soldiers and volunteers, and it doesn’t stop at your great grandmothers who were home makers, nurturers, talented and creative women. Your family tree goes all the way back to the Shvatim and the Avot.  You are a descendent of Cohanim from Shevet Levi and maybe the tribe of Yehudah – you are part of a great family and a great nation, so walk with pride and dignity!
  8. Cards – Chazal say that we are called Yehudim because we have the ability to say Toda – to acknowledge in front of Hashem and others He has done something for us that we couldn’t have done ourselves.  You will find in here a little box with 10 cards. We recommend that you think about who you want to thank, and what you want to thank them for – and write them a note to express your appreciation.
  9. Stencil – BATgirl, from your grandparents you received Machzorim, from school you received a beautiful siddur – we have nothing left to give but this stencil.  We hope that you give the siddur and machzor good use, but we also hope that you can find your own way to send your hopes, thoughts and prayers to Hashem – here are some letters – you can make the words!

    Croc key ring

    The blue croc keyring has found a home

  10. Blue Croc keyring - we think you will like this – it looks like your favorite blue croc!  We got this comfy shoe, because you have come a long way in your 12 years, and the shoe represents the path that you have come on. This year started off as quite a difficult one for you, but you pulled though with new strengths – we are very very proud of you!  BATgirl, being a Bat Mitzvah girl means you are now an adult with adult responsibilities – this is a new path for you to go on, and we want you to know that we are with you all of the way!
  11. Bubbles – Yes – these are bubbles!  Bubbles are fun!  We have expressed lots of hopes for you, and given much advice to you – at the end of the day we hope that you have fun and enjoy!  In your life as a Torah Jew you should have simcha in fulfilling the mitzvot and building a relationship with Hashem, and in your personal life you should have lots of great adventures and fun memories!
  12. Blank paper – Finally – this looks like a blank piece of paper, but actually BATgirl – it is your flag!  Last week we designed another flag for you. Many of the important people in your life colored this flag and sent us the photo’s – we’ll see them all in a few minutes.  This flag is for you – it is blank and we hope that in the years to come, as you continue to grow, as your talents and strengths continue to develop you will design your own flag. BATgirl – we look forward to watching you Wave your Flag – mazal tov!

And now, click below to watch the amazing journey of BATgirl growing up and see her friends and loved one’s Waving her Flag!

 

This week I was at a beautiful baby girl ceremony.

My friends Shani and Ilan wanted to celebrate the birth of their second daughter, their fourth child. This ceremony was particularly pertinent because it took place on the baby’s 31 day of life, 31 days after Ilan’s father had passed away. Yes, the beautiful blessing was born the same hour that Ilan’s father left this world.

My husband and I came early, as I had a work meeting and was not able to stay for long. When we arrived we were stunned by the beautiful sight of lime covered tables with the cutest blow up animals as centerpieces. This was a cheerful sight, but food was not on display yet, and there was no music.  It was clear to us the food and festive spirit was not going to be the focus of the occasion.

Simchat Bat Centerpieces

Simchat Bat Blow up animal Centerpieces

This hunch was confirmed when, as the hall filled up with visitors, Ilan invited the guests to come to the center of the room and form a circle.  We did so, and Ilan explained that he had asked his Rabbi whether he could have a celebration party for his baby daughter in the traditional year of mourning. The Rabbi suggested that he could, but it should be immediately after the initial 30 days of mourning.

Ilan then explained that the baby will be brought through the circle of visitors to the lap of her grandmother, Ilan’s mother, by Ilan and Shani. The baby was passed by Shani’s mother on a pink pillow to Shani, and the women visitors were encouraged to put jewelry on the pillow as a symbol of the righteous women in the desert who volunteered their jewelry to build the holy sanctuary.  (Don’t worry, the jewelry was returned!) Holding candles Shani and Ilan carried their baby girl to her paternal grandmother, who placed the pillow with the content baby on her lap. Shani and Ilan sprinkled salt around the baby to represent the preciousness and eternity.

Pink pillow for the baby girl

Pink pillow for the baby girl

Unfortunately at that point I had to run, I heard that Ilan spoke beautifully, that there was the singing of lovely Jewish melodies and the food was great.  Although I was there for only a short time, the message that I got from Shani and Ilan’s Simchat Bat, was that the food and lighthearted spirits was secondary to the meaning and content of the occasion.

Mazal Tov Shani and Ilan on the birth of your precious baby girl, may you have much nachas from her, and may she and you be blessed with all things good and happy!

Blessings to you Shani and Ilan!

 

Were you at an especially meaningful Simchat Bat ceremony? I’d love to hear about it!

The all important 3 M’s of Bar/Bat Mitzvah gifts

When we BM parents were growing up, a very common bar or Bat Mitzvah present was a fountain pen. Hence the joke went, when the bar mitzvah boy got up to speak to the synagogue, he would say, “Today I am a fountain pen.”  But times have changed, and perhaps the line can be adapted to read “today I am an ipod”.  Bar Mitzvah presents fall into 3 general categories – we like to call it the 3 M’s: Money, Meaningful, and “Much Appreciated”.

Bar/Bat Mitzvah gifts

Bar/Bat Mitzvah gifts

Money Bar Mitzvah Gifts

You can never go wrong with money presents, in Jewish tradition if you’re going to give money, a meaningful number is 18 because in Hebrew it has the same numerical value as the word Chai,meaning “ life”.  People often give Jewish money gifts in multiples of 18 – $36, $54, $90.  Included in the money category is gift certificates which can also be in multiples of 18.    Most adults give money as a gift. Children, when invited separately, will usually buy a present that they feel their friend would like. Family members usually give bigger amounts of money than casual friends.  It is wise to place the cash in a birthday card and present it when entering the party room or hall. If there is a welcoming line with family and the birthday boy or girl you can give it then, if not, there should be a table or basket set up for gifts. Give all gifts at the reception, not at the Temple/synagogue/shul.

Money Bar/Bat Mitzvah gifts

Money Bar/Bat Mitzvah gifts

Meaningful Bar Mitzvah Gifts

Since the Bar/Bat Mitzvah is really a celebration of Jewish adulthood, some people choose to give gifts connected to the landmark moment.  Judaica is a nice option – for you can get a nice kiddish cup for boys or candle sticks for girls. If the Bar/Bat Mitzvah is close to a festival you can get Judaica connected to the festival like Machzorim prayer books for the high holy days or a menorah at Chanukah time.  Jewelry is a wonderful gift, and can be meaningful for boys and for girls.  Alef Bet Jewelry has a Bat Mitzvah line which is worth looking at http://alefbet.com/. Jewelry Designer Emily Rosenfeld told us that Bar and Bat Mitzvah favorites are Yads, Key Chains and Panels.  She has a new boys jewelry line which is popular also http://www.emilyrosenfeld.com/ . Jewish related books are also popular meaningful gifts.

Meaningful Bat Mitzvah gifts

Meaningful Bat Mitzvah gifts (from AlefBet Jewerly - voucher below :)

“Much Appreciated” Bar Mitzvah Gifts

If you just want to go with someone fun that the Bar/Bat Mitzvah child will definitely appreciate, then you may want to go for games – computer, electronic, sports equipment, camping gear, something hobby related or vouchers to popular stores.  It is a good idea to enclose a exchange receipt.

 

"Much Appreciated" Bar/Bat Mitzvah gifts

"Much Appreciated" Bar/Bat Mitzvah gifts

 

Our readers suggest:

Some of our readers have shared some more fantastic ideas.

Debbie L – Great “Much Appreciated” gifts can be match/concert/season tickets

Joanne - iTunes gift cards were the easiest to use quickly, gender neutral, and fun. (Joanne also runs a wonderful Bar/Bat Mitzvah service making cool kippot – check it out http://www.maybe-sew.com/)

Clara – One family bought my oldest son a Kodak Playsport waterproof video camera. That was a hit!

Dalit – My son was very excited about some of the Jewish books that he received for his bar mitzvah.

Sarah – Money, money and money. We live in Israel and that is what you give. Mind you, I have seen people give camping equipment which is also very popular. I particularly love those little gas things that you can scramble eggs on and make hot water on.

Ilana – I have bought a few Bat Mitzvah girls identity necklaces or bracelets!

Miriam – Best present my daughter received for her Batmitzvah was a huge rucksack/camping backpack which she takes on all her school.

Ester – My son got a huge backpack and a water bottle backpack too. Those have been very handy. But we also really like the books and book store gift cards, and of course, the cash. Best of all was a new computer!

Janice – My nephew got so many rucksacks and camping equipment he thought people were trying to tell him something!

Gillian Kay – It’s a good idea to make a book list, so he/she gets the books he/she wants, not 10 of the same. Gift cards for shops like Fox and Gap go down well.

Debbie B – I have a friend whose daughter was an avid reader, so three of her friends got together, pooled their money and got her an e-reader with a very large gift card and a list of all of the classics that she should load onto it. Clever, right?

The nice people from Ultimate Affair Weddings told us – The new Sony camera , with a few photo albums, Kinda pricey gift but I have seen that a few times in the last few months. Thumb Drives is another one. Journals, Mont Blanc Pen Set, Waterman Pens.

And now – a gift to you:

Check out this surprise for you from AlefBet Jewelry http://www.alefbet.com/ They told us “We have jewelry! Use coupon happyholidays2011 and take 15% off entire order!”

Do you have any more great Bar/Bat Mitzvah gift suggestions? Please tell us in the comment box below.

A guide to Jewish wedding dancing!

The Jewish wedding is a real Simcha – a joyful occasion – and it is even considered a mitzvah for the guests to add even more joy to the happiness of the bride and groom on their wedding day.  Since the earliest of times, the Jewish people have celebrated special moments in song and dance, and Jewish weddings are no exception.

Chair Dancing at Jewish Wedding

Chair Dancing at Jewish Wedding from everafterimages.com

Jewish Circle Dancing and the Hora

No Jewish wedding is complete without the Hora, this generally comprises a medley of popular Jewish tunes, including Hava Nagila (‘come let us be glad’), and Siman Tov U Mazleltov (‘may good luck come to us’). During the circle dancing, some of the stronger guests lift the bride and groom up on chairs (or even together on a table), high above the crowd.  This is sometimes called the Wedding Chair Dance. Friends and family dance around in an ecstatic circle as the bride and groom try not to look (or fall) down.

Mitzvah Dances

Entertaining the bride and groom on their wedding day is not only a mitzvah (good deed) but it is also considered an obligation. At traditional Jewish weddings, the couple is seated on chairs and guests dance before them with masks, silly costumes, and props.  Don’t be surprised if you will find in this part of the dancing bottle dancers, flame eaters, jugglers and unicyclers.  In some circles, this is part of the “shtick”.

 

Fire eater amuses bride and groom at Jewish wedding

Fire eater amuses bride and groom at Jewish wedding from http://www.michaeltemchine.com/

Mezinke Tanz OR Krenzel

The Mezinke Tanz is one of the concluding dances of the night and the purpose of this dance is now to honor the parents who have married off their last child. The proud (and relieved) parents sit on chairs in the middle of the dance floor while friends and family dance around, kissing them as they pass in front.  The dance is also known as Krenzel (Yiddish for “crown”), this is because a crown of flowers is traditionally placed in the mother’s hair during the dance.

What was the most unforgettable part of Jewish wedding dancing that you experienced?

 

Lyrics to Dip Your Apple- The Ein Prat Fountainheads

 

New school year, new Jewish year, new beginnings, new hopes, new starts, new chances!  How wonderful that we have the chance to wipe the slate clean and start afresh.  To my husband, children, family and friends-  may your new beginnings open the doors to the richest blessings!

Enjoy the Fountain Heads, lyrics below:

From Batmom, the surprising Superhero!

 

 


 

 

 

Tekia, shevarim, terua x2  (sounds of the shofar)

A new year rising

A new beginning

Lift your heard up, turn yourself ‘round, the world is spinning

Feel the magic of a new day

Open your heart to a fresh start, send your fears away

You’ve made mistakes- you feel it

You’ve got what it takes – believe it

Any wrong can be made right

Just forgive you need not fight

Shana tova u Metuka – its Rosh Hashana (Good and sweet year)

Shana tova, u’metuka

Dip your apple in the honey, on Rosh Hashana

It’s Rosh Hashana

 

So many new hopes

Waiting to find you

Open your eyes

The dreams you prize are all around you

The smiles are hiding

No use in guessing

Make up your mind, go out and find

That simple blessing

This is your time – you feel it

How sweet it is – believe it

Any wrong can be made right

Just forgive you need not fight

Shana Tova u Metuka – its Rosh Hashana

 

Aneinu – shana tova

 

Shana tova, u’metuka

Dip your apple in the honey on Rosh Hashana

Shana tova, u’metuka

Hear the sounds of jubilation – its Rosh hashana

 

Yehi Ratzon shenihiyeh – rosh- lo zanav (May it be Your Will that we will be like the head and not the tail)

Filling life for those around us with joy and love

Avinu malkeinu chaneinu veanaeinu (Our Father, Our King, Have mercy on us and answer us)

Hear our prayer Oh Lord

Inscribe us in the book of life

 

Chaneinu vaeinenu, shana tova

 

Shana tova, u’metuka

Dip your apple in the honey – on Rosh Hashana

Hear the sounds of jubilation – its Rosh hashana

 

Give us life Lord

And sustain us

Oh deliver us

To salvation

 

It is New Year

On Rosh Hashana

Make your loved ones smile

It’s Rosh Hashana

Open your hearts to one another its Rosh hashana

It’s Rosh Hashana

Batmom Blog: The grinch who stole the Bat Mitzvah!

This week Bat Mitzvah Mom, Alissa, is our guest blogger.

A mother and a daughter’s idea of a Bat Mitzvah seems to be two different things.  Huh?  At least in my family it is!  You see I’m a Jewish mom who used to teach 6th grade Hebrew school for goodness sake.  For years I taught with the aim to inspire Bnei Mitzvah to continue their Jewish heritage and to be proud of their religion at the time of their coming of age.  The truth is, I am not so anti-the-ceremony as I am anti the big party.

 

The big BAT MITZVAH PARTY!

The big BAT MITZVAH PARTY!

We are Reform Jews in Los Angeles, so a Bat-Mitzvah is totally ordinary in our community.  All girls read from the Torah and give a speech the exact same as a boy of the age of 13.  All of my daughter’s friends are having a bat/bar mitzvah, and the friends are helping one another celebrate by first attending the ceremony and after the party.  Now, I am ready to sit up on the bima and smile and brag about my daughter’s love, I mean LOVE of Judaism!  I am ready to write a speech about her life and read it to the congregation.  But then, the celebration……..  I get squeamish even thinking about it.

My real plan was to go to Israel for three glorious weeks in the winter.  To have a small celebration there with the Israeli side of the family, and do a little dinner there, a little dancing, we’ll be at last with the family for an extended period of time and of course not for pure happy-celebrations.  However, my daughter says, “NO!” She prefers a party for the friends and family.  I am in a real dilemma, and can’t wrap my head around the idea of entertaining for five hours instead of spending three weeks abroad.

Judaica from alefbet.com

Bat Mitzvah Judaica from alefbet.com

With my inner-issues of not wanting to celebrate with others, I am a little resentful of the whole idea now.  I do not particularly like spending money on other people, just to hear them say, “the music was too loud… the food was tasteless… the decorations were boring.”  I wonder if all parents feel this way?  I doubt it, since many mothers speak highly of the entire planning process.  I have yet to hear anyone say they don’t want to plan and entertain others.  I think I am the only one, the grinch who stole the Bat Mitzvah?

The grinch who stole the Bat Mitzvah

The grinch who stole the Bat Mitzvah

 

Alissa, co-owner of Alef Bet Jewelry, designs and manufactures jewelry in Los Angeles, CA .  Run by Paula, mother of 3, grandma of 5, and Alissa, mother of 3.   Inspired long ago by the Hebrew alphabet, Alef Bet Jewelry first designed Hebrew letter beads.  We named ourselves after the beads, but people kept on asking us, “what else do you have?”  That is how the business developed…a need for modern Judaic jewelry.  More than 15 years later, Alef Bet Jewelry designs and manufactures hamsas, evil eye pendants, religious sayings, red string bendel bracelets, and of course, a Jewish Star.

 

 

Batmom Blog: My new blog: What’s in a name?

So, here I am, a year before my eldest daughter’s Bat Mitzvah, and about to launch my new blog, which will chronicle this next stage in my life – Bat Mitzvah parenthood and all that it brings.  Upon contemplating my blog-to-be, I realized that like all things in life, if it doesn’t have a name, it doesn’t exist.  So I decided to challenge friends and acquaintances from a broad cross-section of my life to help me name my blog, and in this way to accord it a reality.  Thanks to all of my Facebook friends who responded on my wall and in private – each suggestion helped to bring my blog closer to existence, in ways that I am about to explain.

In search of a blog self identity

me on the couch thanks to blameitonthemuse.com

Me on the couch LOL blameitonthemuse.com

Raphael – my school friend, who I haven’t seen in almost 20 years (yes, we’re THAT old), was very helpful in sorting out my blog self identity issues. Playing virtual “shrink”, he asked me “what does it mean to you to be a “bat mitzvah” mom? Do you love it? Is it a shlep? Is it fun but tiring? Is it mostly silly or is mostly serious?”  He told me to figure out the main “thing” I want to communicate and the name will follow.  Raphael’s questions helped me realize that the blog is really about the Bat Mitzvah from my perspective and only indirectly about my daughter.   I realized that I see the blog as part of my own journey or adventure that I am anticipating with both trepidation and eagerness.

Gila, a friend from my youth who actually made it all the way into my present life, went down the “call a spade a spade” route with her suggestion “blogging towards bat mitzvah”.  Sarah my FB friend who I have never actually met in real life also took this approach, and in a later comment mentioned Bat Mitzvah norms like finding caterers and halls.  That gave me a platform to reveal my secret card – I won’t be having caterers and halls for my daughter’s Bat Mitzvah.  This will be a celebration designed for my amazing daughter, who doesn’t fit into your standard 12 year old girl cookie cutter.

 

My blog must express the confusion that lies ahead

Confused Bat Mitzvah mom thanks to innoocentdevil.files.wordpress.com

Confused Bat Mitzvah mom innoocentdevil.files.wordpress.com

With his “But Mister…!?” (instead of Bat Mitzvah), my cousin Mike who shares memories of summer days in Sunny Cape Town, started a chain of “punny” options, all of which helped to express the confusion that I feel lies ahead.  Miri, also from my “early life” Cape Town days, suggested “Bat Mitzvah Buts” and Kevin, from my “middle life” in (anything but Sunny) London suggested “Bat-ty Mitzvah Mum” or “Bat-tered Mitzvah Mum”.

Dani, another old school friend, whose friendship has been renewed over FB messages, suggested “Me, Tatty and the Dati Batti”.  It’s light and funky for the frum crowd and as she said “It’s got a Dr Seuss ring to it!”

My new and anonymous Facebook friend, messaged me with some wonderful ideas like -”it’s my Bati, & I’ll cry if I want to………” and “Talibat Time”.  Her discretion reminded of the internet rule – if you wouldn’t want to see it plastered on a interstate billboard – then don’t say it on the internet!   In my search for blog self identity, this reaffirmed that there are things best not said online, and to extend that idea, sentiments expressed in cyberspace cannot be exchanged for words that pass between two humans, in each other’s presence.

A “motherload” of love

I grew up with Gary, as our moms are practically best friends, despite the oceans that now separate them.  He suggested ‎”The motherload of womanhood  – my 12-month adventure in becoming a Bat Mitzvah Mom.” I loved “motherload”.  It reminded me of the most important of all titles that I claim – mother – and how privileged I am that I have four young people who call me that!

 

We're all sponges, trying to soak it up!

We're all sponges, trying to soak it up!

“We’re all sponges, trying to soak it up”

Nick was trying to be funny when he said “With all the knowledge that goes into a Bat Mitzvah, it’s kind of like a sponge” but actually I took him very seriously.  Nick and I shared a common school principal, who often reminded us that we had to be like sponges to soak in all the good that our school offered. That principal even used buckets of water and a sponge to illustrate his point.  That principal is my father. Nick – you reminded me that as children we are bound to our parents, even after we have left home and started our own lives.  As both a child and a parent, I am learning that the nature of that knot depends on your investment of self, and knowing when to embrace and when to let go.

Michal commented “How can she be bat mitzvah yet???” You’re right Mich, time has flown too fast -but you can hardly comment – I was your form tutor when you were in 7th grade and you’re almost finished college.  That flabbergasts me equally!  Note to self – our parenthood days are short; live every moment with love, enjoyment and intensity.

Batmom - not my t-shirt- but it should be!

Batmom - not my t-shirt- but it should be!

Fanfare and trumpets, the name is about to be revealed…

So with all of that, the time has come to reveal my blog’s name.  This name is the fruit of the creativity of those who have known me for varying periods over the past 30 years, merged with my own over-active musings.  This name represents a blog about a woman who is trying her best to be supermom, but doesn’t always manage, and despite the dips in the road, it is about a woman who is determined to provide the best, most meaningful and personalized Bat Mitzvah to her firstborn daughter.  (It is also about a woman who is a bit surprised that she is calling herself a woman, because she feels like a kid.)

If you are interested in parenting, if you are interested in Bar or Bat Mitzvah’s, or if you are interested in life from my particular angle, then this blog might be for you, and I invite you to follow it with the RSS feed button. So friends and readers – please welcome to the world of cyber space my brand new, squeaky clean blog: “Batmom – the journey of a surprising superhero!”

PS. If you liked this, and you’re that way inclined, I would love it if you would like, comment, share or tweet!

In memorium

hesped speech“I am a repeat customer and once again Tali saved the day!  Recently I attended an emotional family gathering and I didn’t realize until a couple days prior to the event that I needed to deliver a speech at the event.   With very little time to write the speech, I remembered that Tali had assisted me with a speech several years ago.  I contacted Tali and she quickly returned my call.  Once again Tali wrote a meaningful and beautiful speech that not only captured the essence of the event, but significantly reduced my stress knowing she had prepared such a wonderful speech for me.  Thank you!  In appreciation…” Chicago
There may be a time when you are called to speak at a funeral or memorial ceremony of a loved one, in Hebrew this is called giving a Hesped.
At Your Jewish Speech, we hope we will only speak to you on happy occasions, but if you are called to give a speech at a funeral, shiva or memorial service, then please contact us to see how we can help you!

Blessing for affixing the Mezuzah

Mezuzah fixing ceremonyBefore affixing a mezuzah to a doorpost, the following blessing is recited:

Hebrew: ברוך אתה ה’ אלוקנו מלך העולם אשר קדשנו במצותיו וצונו לקבוע מזוזה

Transliteration: Barukh ata Adonai Eloheinu Melekh ha-olam, asher kidshanu b’mitzvotav v’tzivanu likbo-a mezuzah.

Translation: Blessed are You, Adonai our God, Ruler of the universe, Who sanctifies us with holy commandments and commands us to fix a mezuzah.

If you have a number of mezuzah’s to place, you recite the blessing once (usually on the front door) , keeping the rest of the mezuzot in the house in mind. After reciting the blessing, no words are spoken until all mezozot are hung throughout the house.

All about the Mezuzah

Chanukat HaBayit CeremonyAnd you shall write [the words that I command you today] on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. -Deuteronomy 6:9, 11:19

On the doorposts of many Jewish homes, you will find a mezuzah. The word mezuzah actually is Hebrew for “doorpost”. The mezuzah is a constant reminder of God’s presence.

What’s inside the Mezuzah?

In the book of Deuteronomy (Dvarim). 6:4-9, God commands the Jewish people to keep His words constantly in our minds and in our hearts by (among other things) writing them on the doorposts of our house. These words are part of the most important prayer called  Shema Yisrael.  The complete text of Shma Yisrael is written on a tiny scroll of parchment and placed inside the Mezuzah.  On the back of the scroll is written one of the names of God. The parchment is then rolled up and placed in the mezuzah case, so that the first letter of God’s name (the letter Shin) is visible.  The scroll must be handwritten in the same style of writing that one uses to write a Torah.  This writing is called “Stam”.

Fixing the Mezuzah
The case and scroll are then nailed or affixed at an angle to the right side doorpost as you enter the building or room, with a small ceremony called Chanukkat Ha-Bayit.   A brief blessing is recited.
Kissing the Mezuzah
Every time you pass through a door with a mezuzah on it, you touch the mezuzah and then kiss the fingers that touched it, expressing love and respect for G-d and his mitzvot and reminding yourself of the mitzvot contained within them.